Go ahead and tell me your sob story about the perfect girl who broke your heart. But 1) don’t do it in front of your current girlfriend and 2) if you’re with her, shouldn’t she be the One?
Ok, lately I have had way too many men practically fall all over themselves to tell me about the “One Who Got Away”. Now, I don’t mind listening to the poor, misguided sod who thinks that everything would have been just fine if only he had stayed with Her. But if he does it right in front of the woman he is currently dating, I have a huge issue.
A few weeks ago, my boyfriend, Malcolm, and I went over to our friends’ house for dinner. Let’s call them Laura and Sam. While Laura and my boyfriend put the finishing touches on dinner, I hung out in their little breakfast nook with Sam and a bottle of wine. Now, I’ve known Sam casually for a while, so it’s not like we were talking as total strangers, but we had never really had a conversation of any substance.
So, after some pleasantries about work (and a few glasses of wine), he suddenly dove into a story about how much he missed his girlfriend from college; how he felt that they would have been perfect if only they’d stayed together; how amazingly passionate they were in bed; that she’d made him feel like a real man; and so on and so forth. And I’m thinking: Your girlfriend is right here in this very room, you buzzed d*ckwad. What the hell are you thinking? How insensitive are you? I know you’re whispering, but do you think she’s stupid or deaf?
I was flabbergasted. I’m rarely speechless, but I couldn’t think of anything to say except: Please shut up... What do you think about this wine?
Big picture: it’s their mess to deal with. To be completely transparent, Malcolm told me that Laura’s really not that into Sam anyway. They will choose their own paths. They are both intelligent people. If they want to live in a dreamworld, it’s their choice. I don’t really know either of them well enough to get involved. Besides, I wanted my dinner and the aromas wafting around the kitchen were ambrosial.
But there are 2 things that really rankle me about this situation:
1) The idea of the One being someone in the past. If you were meant to be together, you would still be together. There had to have been something wrong in the relationship on either the SO’s side or yours for the split to have taken place. (At this point, I’m betting it was something on the SO’s side.)
2) Men (and women, too): If you are still pining over the One and are currently in a relationship with someone, the person you are with is not the right person for you. Do the kind thing. Do the right thing for both of you. Stop wasting time. Man up / woman up and break up.
Oh, and don’t make yourself look like even more of an a$$ and talk about the One right in front of your SO.
Go ahead and tell me your sob story about the perfect girl who broke your heart. But 1) don’t do it in front of your current girlfriend and 2) if you’re with her, shouldn’t she be the One?
ReplyDeleteWelcome to the family, Crimson!
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